Selah2020: Pause and Reflect

[This is one in a series of devotional reflections prepared for Horley Baptist Church during April 2022]

Dear John^[1],
I regret that I cannot talk with you directly; you are a busy man and seldom have the time to pause and listen, but I want you to know that you are still valued as a member of your family; you have not been rejected in any way.

Your wife is very worried about you; she has not eaten, she spent the day watching the telephone, waiting for you to call. Your young daughter showed me photos of you and then said “Daddy has gone”. They still love you and appreciate the things that you can do for them.

It is difficult when our dreams do not work out as planned. You work hard at a job you enjoy but the rewards are not adequate to meet your needs. The costs of running your business are overwhelming you; tax demands and utility bills eat up your income before you can enjoy it. I understand that – there were times when I could not afford the fare to go to work.

Society places its own demands upon you. You have two children to support: food, clothing, schooling, pocket money, even other children’s birthday parties all add to your burden. You have some loyal friends and it is natural that you should want to socialise a bit with them.

Your wife could help you with those costs, if you would let her. You come from a tradition where a man is supposed to be able to provide for his family, but such traditions have to change. It is no shame in these days for both parents to share the burden of maintaining the household. This is one area where you both need to stop talking at each other and take the time to actually listen to each other.

It is easy to slip into depression; you ask yourself whether you can do better somewhere else, or even if it is worth continuing at all. What is life for if nothing good comes from it? Do not allow these thoughts to stay in your mind. If you cannot shake them off then ask for help.

You believe that there is a God but you do not recognise that he has any relevance to your daily life. This is a good starting place. There is a story in the Bible about a king called Hezekiah. During his reign he was faced with a number of demands that he could not meet^[2]. After struggling desperately he eventually held the letter up to God and said, with sincerity, “Lord, help us!” That was a turning point in his life.

The next time that you get a bill that you cannot meet don’t ignore it or swear at it, just hold it up and say the same simple words: “Lord, help us”. Do not keep the problem to yourself; other people are willing to help you, if you let them.

Finally, do not try to run away from your troubles, they will only get worse and you are needed at home.

I hope this letter will be of some help to you.

[1]: The identity of the addressee has been changed. The circumstances of this letter are real but they are not uncommon. Perhaps these thoughts will be of some help to other readers.
[2]: 2 Kings 19 v14.

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