[This reflection by Helen Ruffhead was published in the weekly news bulletin of Horley Baptist Church, 30/Mar/2025]
Today is a very special one for my family, as it is not just Mothering Sunday but also the 35th anniversary of the day I brought my older son David home – the happiest day of my life. Since then, God has given me a second adopted son Michael and nearly 30 years later a foster daughter Amy.
When I left work to adopt David, one of my colleagues wrote on my leaving card:
“Good luck in your new job. Pay: miserable, hours: long, rewards: immense.”
He was right on all counts!
One of the best things about parenthood is that it helps us to understand the love of our Father God. As I gazed in delight on my sleeping child I was able to appreciate for the first time, Zephaniah 3 v17 which says: “The Lord your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing”.
Perhaps the hardest thing a parent has to cope with is to see your child suffer. When Michael was diagnosed with diabetes, he was too young to understand why I was pricking his finger 4 times a day for blood tests and stabbing him with a syringe to inject his insulin. No wonder he struggled and cried, while his brother also cried and said: “Michael doesn’t like it!”
It reminded me of times I have struggled with God when he has allowed painful things to happen in my life. I don’t understand the reasons, just as Michael could not understand why I was hurting him, but need to trust that “in all things God works for the good of those who love him” (Romans 8 v28).
Mothering Sunday can be a very painful day for those who want children and can’t have them, or who have lost a child. It is perhaps even more painful for those who have not had a loving mother. Adoption and fostering are wonderful ways of healing the pain of both groups by bringing them together.
Sing, barren woman, you who never bore a child; burst into song, shout for joy, you who were never in labour; because more are the children of the desolate woman than of her who has a husband,” says the LORD.” Isaiah 54 v1 [NIVUK]
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Last Sunday’s reflection: The Golden Rule: Love Without Loopholes by Dazz Jones
Contributed by Helen Ruffhead; © Helen Ruffhead